Married Folk and Christians Aren’t Allowed to Have Good Sex.

And if you’re both, you’re screwed, apparently.

I came across an article today talking about gospel singer Erica Campbell and how she brags about her husband’s sex game. I immediately checked it out, and as usual with headlines, they’re often displaced and misleading.

I saw the Instagram post the article was referring to. She never bragged that his sex game was A1. She put a few hashtags that alluded to this (#chocolatetastegood, #lawdhamercy, #satisfied), but to me, that doesn’t constitute as bragging.

I’m expecting bragging to be along the lines of…
#dickgameistoostrong #hetasteslikeheaven #mylegsareweak #icameseventimes #takethewheel #hotdamn #myhusbandfucksbetterthanyours

…or something of the sort.

And in reality, this wouldn’t have even made news if she wasn’t a gospel singer and wasn’t an open Christian (meaning, we KNOW she’s a Christian). People make it seem like as Christians, we cannot have ANY type of fun, sexual or not. I don’t know about yours, but MY bible encourages sexual relations (ha… Bill Clinton) between husband and wife. Hebrews 13:4 reads :

Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.

I read marriage devotionals with my husband every night, and the main basis behind many of these is communication and sexual intimacy. These devotionals make it known that sex was created to be enjoyed in marriage, and is one of the most intimate ways to reconnect with your spouse in a way that you can’t with anyone else.

Christians seem to have this mindset that sex has to be vanilla (boring, bland, suckish). Who says that you can’t explore toys, lubes, role play, or anything with your spouse? Sex doesn’t have to be confined to the “marriage bed”. Keep it fun with your spouse; there is nothing wrong with making your sex life lively and entertaining. Everyone has at least one fantasy. Bring it up in open conversation with your spouse, and work toward making it happen.

Is BDSM off limits in marriage or in a relationship at all? No. NO. NOOO. You can be a Dom/sub couple and have a very fulfilling marriage. In ways, it can even enhance it. If you wanna keep the pure marriage theme, hop on some white satin blindfolds and wrist ties, and white lacy lingerie. Penthouse has a nice bridal bondage kit, it’s not hardcore and is still romantic. It has a satin blindfold, wrist ties, ankle ties, a massage candle, and a book of suggestions for the ties. Bought it for our wedding weekend and it didn’t even get used… Lol. But it’s still a great starter setfor a married couple.

Point is, don’t think that being married or a Christian sets you up for having a dull sex life. Don’t let that define you. Being married in itself, minus the daily stresses of life, work, and kids, should be enough to keep it spicy!

I applaud Erica Campbell. She’s proud of her sex life with her husband and doesn’t mind saying it.

And as a married Christian myself… I’m right there with her.


K. P.



  1. dottiedaniels · October 7, 2014

    I heard it’s even worse if you’re Catholic- Lol. It’s probably our value system’s double-edge sword that does this to our psyche. It also causes the blindness we have about our parents and grandparents having passionate, unbridled, hot sex and the instincts women inherited somewhere to throw our legs in the air… Got it from someone, right? We were taught to respect religious individuals sans their sexuality, which may in turn still suggest that even to this day in our hyper-sexualized culture- sex is still as taboo as we once thought it was.


    • goodblackloving · October 8, 2014

      Yeah man. It’s unfortunate that we have these stigmas surrounding sex as Christians and it makes (some of) us feel like we aren’t supposed to enjoy ourselves. Like religious people don’t/can’t have sex. Please. Won’t be me…

      Liked by 1 person

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